I've heard that question a lot lately. Each time I answer: "In May," and most times that's where the conversation ends. I either get an "I'm sorry" or a "That sucks." And every time my heart hurts.Yet, today it was different. Today my friend did not tell me she was "sorry." She did not do what most of my friends did when they asked me that same question. Instead, she hugged me and said "It will be okay. You can do this." And then she encouraged me to talk about him. She encouraged me to talk about my feelings. She was there for me.
As I talked to her, I relaxed and spoke about every thought and every feeling I've had in the past few weeks. He is leaving in May. Every time I say or write this, my heart skips a few beats. I miss him, I am afraid, I am scared out of my mind, yet I am also hopeful. The good outweighs the bad, because I prefer to be away from him than to be with anyone else. I prefer to be lonely and/or scared sometimes, than to be without him. Today, I got to talk about every hope, dream, and fear I have had since the day I met him. I got to drop my guard and be myself for a while. I did not have to hide or lie about anything and that felt so good. I love my friends and I have no idea what I would do without my friends.
I thank God every single day for all of my friends and the way they bless me each and every day of my life. I thank God for bringing me my soldier, even on days when I hear the dreaded question: "When is he leaving?" because I know that no matter what, my life has changed for the better ever since he became a part of it. I know that no matter what I have to face, I will be able to do it because he will be my motivation.
Today, I got asked the question that usually breaks my heart, yet, that question gave me the chance to heal and grow. It gave me the chance to look at myself and acknowledge the fact that I can get through anything with God's grace, my friends' support, and my soldier's love.
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." -Philippians 4:13-
As I talked to her, I relaxed and spoke about every thought and every feeling I've had in the past few weeks. He is leaving in May. Every time I say or write this, my heart skips a few beats. I miss him, I am afraid, I am scared out of my mind, yet I am also hopeful. The good outweighs the bad, because I prefer to be away from him than to be with anyone else. I prefer to be lonely and/or scared sometimes, than to be without him. Today, I got to talk about every hope, dream, and fear I have had since the day I met him. I got to drop my guard and be myself for a while. I did not have to hide or lie about anything and that felt so good. I love my friends and I have no idea what I would do without my friends.
I thank God every single day for all of my friends and the way they bless me each and every day of my life. I thank God for bringing me my soldier, even on days when I hear the dreaded question: "When is he leaving?" because I know that no matter what, my life has changed for the better ever since he became a part of it. I know that no matter what I have to face, I will be able to do it because he will be my motivation.
Today, I got asked the question that usually breaks my heart, yet, that question gave me the chance to heal and grow. It gave me the chance to look at myself and acknowledge the fact that I can get through anything with God's grace, my friends' support, and my soldier's love.
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." -Philippians 4:13-
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